I'm not ready to make nice

"Don't yell and your friends and your church" This was the advice we recieved during our transition talk at UrbanPromise. Last summer I will admit I did just that. I was passionate, and my eyes had been opened to so much through living in Camden but the reactions I got when I returned home were not at all what I had expected. Life had gone on, soon enough the E-town fair was here and the tractor pulls were in full swing, school was starting and everyone was rushing to buy their brand new school supplies, and talking about how many hours a day they practiced. I found it hard to just "jump back in" I mean how could I? With all that I had seen and heard, the people I met, how could I pretend that I was okay with the rest of the world pretending that places like Camden didn't exist. I found that my personally life changing stories didn't have such a huge impact when they hadnt experianced it themselves. This was not only heart breaking but infurating.
As time goes on I continue to learn about what to do with everything Camden has taught me. I honestly still dont have it figured out. But I do know this

I wont forget what I have seen

I wont pretend everythings okay when it's not

I wont be complacent

I wont back down from what I believe in

I have said many times that I am not good with words, and thats why I sing. Someone puts into words all the things that I often cant say. Today as I was youtube I found an old song, called Not ready to make nice.

I’m not ready to make nice
I’m not ready to back down
I’m still mad as hell and
I don’t have time to go round and round and round
It’s too late to make it right
I probably wouldn’t if I could
‘Cause I’m mad as hell
Can’t bring myself to do what it is you think I should

There are times when I cannot back down, because injustice has a name, homelessness has a name, abuse has a name, neglect has a name, suffering has a name, and those are things that I wont back down to because a year later it still makes me mad as hell and the day that I do back down is the day that something inside me dies...